As I’ve been reviewing some of my past writings here on Be Still and Know, I’m overwhelmed with a feeling of repentance and lowliness. Why must I continue to struggle when I know that God calls me to trust Him and rely on His infinite goodness instead of depending on my human weakness? Even so, as I’ve prayed for increased trust and acceptance, God has faithfully put his perfect Word in my path, sometimes with an uncanny relevance.
A good friend gave me a daily devotional for Christmas called, Be Still and Know (but, of course!). I haven’t been reading it consistently, until last week. Last Friday, as my anxiety about not sleeping well recently was at its peak, the Bible verse for February 27th was Psalm 56:8:
You have seen me tossing and turning through the night. You have collected all my tears and preserved them in your bottle! You have recorded every one in your book.
The devotion went on to ask: “Are you an individual who has difficulty sleeping at night? The harder you try, the more you toss and turn… During the dark night hours the tears fall. Our hearts may be broken.” The author describes that David knew pain. In this psalm he is referring to a custom in ancient Persia and Egypt whereby tears were wiped from the eyes and cheeks of mourners and preserved in a tear bottle, which were often times buried with the person. The devotion continued:
But sometimes God knows that for our own good He must remove something from our lives, something we may consider very dear. The tears may fall; we may not understand why, yet He does it for our good. However, He never removes anything from our lives without replacing it with something else. It has been said, “Our broken things lead us to His better things.” God comforts as no one else does. He understands as no one else does.
The thing I feel God removing from my life (again) is my sense of control over my feelings. He is calling me to replace faith in my perceived control (over thoughts, feelings, sleep patterns, etc.) with faith in Him. His better thing is Himself.
Likewise, it’s absolutely true that God comforts us and understands us, like no one else. I shared my thoughts and struggles with a few people who love me, and even they had a hard time truly understanding my experience. That’s when turning to God, who knows me and loves me best, brings great peace and comfort.
C.S. Lewis once said, “God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing.”
We all have the thing we struggle with, the thing that keeps us from allowing God to hold that pinnacle place of worship in our lives. Letting go is hard. Floating in the quicksand isn’t easy. But, when we’re holding onto and trusting in anything other than God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, we’re not leaving room for His Better Things…